Jessica Schab

Bali Blog Series


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Sedona Bound

Hi, my dear ones, and welcome to my first blog from my website. It is a far cry from my very first blog where I wrote “what the heck is a blog?” Or even my second my second blog where I wrote “oh well, it has only been a month or so since my return from Australia.”

As usual, when I travel and return home, I am unsure what to do next, though life does not let me stay in this state very long. It always seems to know what I need to do and where I should go next. Life speaks to me, and I am becoming more fluent in its language.

It seems every adventure I go on is marked with a theme. On this one, the theme I was getting was “things are not as they seem, so watch your assumptions.” OK, this sounds vague like something one would get in a fortune cookie or something not really profound. “Time will tell what will come of this,” I said to myself, as I put my thinking cap on for potential work. I could get film work, but I had been doing this for nine years, and I did not want to do it anymore. I wanted change and excitement.

Club Light Worker

The next day, my girlfriend sent me a job posting from craigslist. It was for a masseuse at a “club nonsexuelle.” When I went to interview, I learned that this place was actually a strip club, and I was being interviewed while a girl in the background was taking off her clothes. Now I had not really been to a strip club before. I do not really party or go clubbing or drink or smoke or do drugs because I am a blond and am naturally high.

At first I was not going to take this job. I did not want to be in a seedy place where I would be seen as just a body or where they could mistake me as a dancer. I could not do this. In my head I was making this out to be a pretty bad place, and I knew that we often tend to make things worse than they actually are. It was an assumption, which is why I decided to call myself on this and see if it were so.

So I gave the job a try, and I was pleasantly surprised that the men were most respectful. When I started working my “jessage” on them, they were not even looking at the dancers as they were blissed-out. I was removing their back pains by massage and energy healing and all the light work I wanted. I was working to turn this dank cave into a lighthouse. Here I could massage however much I wanted, and I could socialize as much as I wanted. I could work as much or as little as I wanted, and have no boss to answer to, and I could show up anytime I wanted as well. 

There were some men who came in and did not even know why they were there. All they knew was that their meeting was canceled, so they wandered around and found themselves there. When I started to share quantum physics and metaphysics with them, they would look at me with a light in their eyes and say, “You’re the reason I am here, to talk to you about this.” I then revealed to them what I was about, and from what they told me, they have not been the same since–for the better, that is.

Not only was the money really good, but another cool thing about this job was that when people did not want a massage, I could just go to my corner with a TV and watch cartoons or write or read or leave certain books out for certain souls to brush past. It was so funny to overhear someone say, “Who goes to a strip club to watch cartoons?” It was even more hilarious when I caught them watching TV rather than the dancers and saying “Hey, I recall this cartoon. I love it.”

This job has turned out to be just exactly what I needed to get me out to Sedona and LA for my next adventure.

Saying Goodbye to My Cats

But first I had to deal with some very sad news about my cats—the ones that I moved to my girlfriend’s farm right before heading to Australia. We had to place them there because we lived in an apartment that did not allow pets. To sneak them in would have resulted in being evicted.

When I went to visit them at the farm, I learned that two of my cats—the father, Mr. Orange, and the son, Panther—had flown the coup. Two weeks later we found Panther, who was being fed by some lady, and she had taken a shine to him. Then we got news that Orange had made his way to where we used to live, a far trek. He had even gone over the bridge and made it to an old neighbor’s door step, where he had collapsed. My mom took him back to the farm, where he died shortly thereafter. His organs had shut down from going two weeks without food. We planted lovely flowers on his grave.

My other cat, Peaky Bear (Panther’s sister and Orange’s daughter), stayed put on the farm as though she knew I would be back. She was right, although she was not OK. She started getting so sad that she did not eat and got really thin. She also developed some abandonment issues. She would only eat if there were people around, and she would shake when they left her. My girlfriend felt she would not last the winter. Luckily, the girl who tended to her horses took a shine to Peaky and offered to take care of Peaky for me. I thought this would work out well because Peaky could always have people around her and she would be a lot closer to me.

I spent everyday going to visit her. It took me a while to get her to forgive me. I told her that I was about to do something very important, the Project Camelot interview in Sedona, and I very much needed her love. It worked. She understood, and her face started to soften as she purred and kissed my nose. 

I had only had a few more days until I headed out to Sedona. I tend to do things very last minute. Heck, I only knew about Australia the day before I left!

Leading Up to Project Camelot

I was still getting people contacting me from the Project Avalon advertisement, and they were telling their friends about me. The synchronicities continue to guide me like the white rabbit. I was introduced to someone who happened to be in California, not far from my other girl friend who I visited for my 11/11 trip. I will write about that adventure another time. Meeting these people is always something I look forward to. It is like going to a family reunion when there is such recognition, and something directs you to them from a deeper soul level.

I had been advised to be ready for a lot of attention after the Project Camelot interview. Sure enough, I had people come forward and offer to help me any way they could. One even offered to put a web site up for me, which subsequently took a lot of work, requiring organization and attention to detail—not my strongest points.

Not only that, I started working on my getting my poem book published, and that also took a lot of time. I kept adding more poems and thinking to myself, “Did I say everything I wanted to say?” Then there was the brutal task of organizing my writings. It would make anyone run for the hills.

I tried not to think about the interview; otherwise, I would get nervous. I was not like other people they interviewed. I did not have credentials, nor was I really a contactee, nor did I have a background with the secret services. Yet I was a young woman who understood the big picture. I was confident that I could give clarity and peace of mind to other Project Camelot interviewees. I also wanted to give more attention to Project Avalon. I wanted to shift the attention to the younger generation, and I envisioned being a pioneer in this. Then other younger ones could feel motivated to come forward and share. I also wanted to get rid of the ridiculous and clichéd doom-and-gloom thing and give a whole new spin to those whom we perceive as the Illuminati. This approach would greatly empower people. I did not want to give them my answers; rather, I would show them how to see what is going on and how to get past the smoke-and-mirrors show.

Project Camelot would be the perfect vehicle to get my message out. Their audience would understand me, and my content seemed to be a perfect fit. Also, the impressive psychic energy of the Project Camelot audience would be valuable for creating a new reality paradigm. I was getting many letters from people who sent their well wishes for my interview. They told me to not worry and just be myself. Well, that was a good thing because being myself was all I knew how to be, and everyone else was taken.

I spent the last few days before the Sedona interview hanging out with my family and watching MacGyver, which I had become hooked on.

Love and hugs sent to you all,


Author: Jessica Schab

Memoirs of a Former Mystic - Blogs I've written many blogs but the series about my time in Bali, Indonesia, when my radical changes took place, is what has garnered the most curiosity and acclaim. In it, I share everything about that process from beginning to end and in great detail, so that others can get to know me and better understand what I am about. My Bali Blog series is an exploration of my own personal confusion towards rational thinking that has helped myself and others to see our own cognitive dissonance. It exposes the many things that we hide from ourselves and why. ​I highly suggest to read the blogs in order, from part 1 to 5. Otherwise, it will be hard to understand the content. I myself am shocked to realize that I had no idea how conditioned and problematic my spiritual beliefs were until I wrote these blogs; how they affected every aspect of my life and created so many unnecessary problems, making me so afraid to even dare to think or imagine my life and who I was without them. I can see now the contradictions I had to want to understand, watching these elements fight within me, planting mine fields of self-destruction in my mind when I forced myself to think without spiritual beliefs that acted like a drug for me, often times taking over my mind and thinking for me. How could I get myself to stop protecting these beliefs? Such a question led me to understand why others are so keen to choose irrationality instead of logic when it comes to their ideologies. It's one of the many reasons that led to me speaking up about why I am so concerned about this movement and the dangers of these beliefs. I would describe my changes as a massive tidal wave; a tsunami sweeping me and everything I was familiar with away. I honestly do not think I would have made it had I not learned how to surf my psyche. You would think the tidal wave would be the worst of it, right? So did I. I can say it’s not the case. You can ask people who have experienced a massive tsunami or any natural disaster and they will tell you the worst part is actually the aftermath; dealing with the dramatic shift, and in my case the psychological changes. How does one go on after something like that? What next? It’s not like one can go back to how things used to be and forget it ever happened; the experience echoes in your bones. It’s futile and insane to rebuild the old and familiar in your psyche and to encourage former hopes and beliefs. Especially because it often is what beckoned and fuelled the tsunami to begin with. When you get to the root, you must start completely new so as not to recreate the past. ​Ha! Easier said than done! So, these blogs are also an invitation and challenge to detect what is confusion and what is fact. To have people ask themselves: Are my beliefs thinking for me? It becomes more apparent and easier to pinpoint and reduce one's conditioned thinking when one finishes the whole series in order. Then, one can see their own results on how they scored with detecting and exploring their own cognitive biases.​ Best of luck. ​Enjoy and please let me know what you think :-)

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